butt plug
anus plug
rubbish cock?
yes
you suck at this game today
oddly enough my penis is pretty tan. the part of my body that gets the least amount of sunlight is tanner than most of the rest of my body.
I think its part of male evolution. Pretty soon they'll have diamonds on them and taste like chocolate.
You look at her and you just know the only action she's gotten is from her tampon..
I don't think so, think I've only met him once, the night I lost my teeth
After 2 hrs of driving around looking for him, we just found him sleeping in the bed of my truck with the cover closed, cuddling with the spare tire.
She barfed in the corner of the baby pool. Then she yelled "it's okay" repeatedly while trying to scoop it out.
On the bright side his mom approves of me. Though it's apparently because she sleeps with married men and has a soft spot for "fellow homewreckers"
Hope your thanksgiving is a complete blowjob festival.
Have you ever just woke up in the morning and felt pregnant
Omg have I shown you my skeezy ex fiancée?
The other one.
I wish I could be happy with a nice Christian girl, but no, I need a hot mess who starts bar fights
I'll be home soonish I need 4th of July sex, it's the American thing to do.
I mean like, I missed 30 minutes of star wars to fuck you on Christmas so you must be worth something
Well yeah. But im not sure i trust the black out drunk high girl giving life advice
I think this is the first time I heard a lesbian version of baby it's cold outside.
Randomize
