Just had another dream about being on Real Chance of Love. I think it's a sign.
I walk in and my mom takes one look at me and just says, ".... Consequences"
she said they gang banged her to "who let the dogs out." the dude left of the middle barked along. sounds like a good time.
my favorite part of the night was when I was in the bathroom frantically trying to get my cat whiskers and nose off to make hooking up less awkward
Tell me you didn't have sex with my dad.
You could have chosen coming to fuck me over getting too hammered to drive. But you made your bed, and now you get to jack off alone in it.
Well that's another check off the sexual bucketlist of things I never wanted to experience.
I should start an etsy shop with all the jewelry and clothes women leave at my house
Hey ask him if he likes swappy seconds
My dad used the quotation mark gesture with his hands when he asked how my "roommate" was doing.
That may be because I drunkenly sent him a pick of you two curled up together like kittens. Two very buff kittens.
Lol what? Monday night impromptu acid drop was the alternative.
I'm currently sitting beside my brother who is taking a bath and feeding him nachos while he covers his genitals. If that's not sibling bonding then I don't know what is
They are gonna stay together and get married and have 2 children before he wakes up and realizes that there is more to life than anal
We drank vodka and koolaid through a traffic cone. It got rowdy.
I got my period during my acid trip. It was weird.
Randomize
