You think ghandi was good in the sack? cuz i sure do.
I'm not gay.
Soooo you want ghandi? is that what your telling me?
If ghandi gives good head...I'm in
Its fine.
problem. drunk. stepbrother hitting on me again. help.
I wish I had more reasons to start sentences with the phrase, "Here's the thing you've got to remember about cougars ...
my math teacher staples burger king applications to failed tests
i got last night's adventure to take the garbage out when he was leaving. my vagina is THAT good.
I found the other part of your tooth if you want to put it under your pillow
Im in your car brotha dog. Its was unlocked, so im gonna sleep in it. well i mean i think its your car be your car.
The notification you get from snapchat that someone took a screenie is like a formal declaration of blackmail.
So we stayed at his mom's and all got drunk and he and I hooked up in his old bedroom. Then his drunk mom came in and tackled us when we were still naked. Why does this keep happening to me?
I fell asleep in the tanning bed, naked, for an hour and a half and I guess they couldn't wake me up so they called the fire department...and they came in while I was passed out naked...
some kid lit a j in the bar tonight. i was in awe of both his boldness and the severe beatdown he received moments later
Pretty sure I was impersonating Rihanna when I kept asking him what my name was while we were making out
Id like to submit an apology whenever you feel like talking.
Its not gonna be for awhile Im not a very forgiving person especially since you TOTALED MY FUCKING CAR.
Cat needed to get out last night. Walking to the door was too much effort so I encouraged (pushed) him to leave via window.
Isn't your room on the second floor?
Basically, I am an endless fountain of unconvential sexual experiences and knowledge.
Randomize
