Have you ever slowed down next to the oldest people on the highway while getting road head just to see their extended reaction?
i'm at sigma nu and gary is here. what do it do?
Stay away from his face.
so i go for his dick?
I went with the blow up doll and I'm glad I did.
You lit the bowl with a rolled up paper towel that you ignited on the stove.
I'll show rhose boucners: You don't let me in, I poop on your pool.
Nothing like puking into an empty cooler at a red light on the way to get plan b.
Just once I'd like to throw a party where I don't have to clean up someone else's blood the next morning.
We never did figure out who the stuff on the wall came from, did we?
I'm gonna win the lottery and buy chinchillas and tattoos for everyone
I slept with someone only because he got my Simon Birch impression. It was a new low.
Like we just had a bunch of sex and then he threaded my eyebrows in bed lol. It was amazing
He wouldn't stop calling me so I sent him a text saying "I'm dead. Dead. Leave me alone." And he replied with "so can I see you then?"
By NOT going to the gym, I'm helping my future. I don't want stripping, prostitution, or porn to be viable money making options.
It was a recodring of you having sex ! It was like an ape and a dying mongoose at a buffet Xoxoxo
there is a naked boy in my bed & you just need to kick him out because i do NOT want to see him when i'm sober.
He just fucked me into paralysis. can't feel my hands or face.
Randomize
