Flowers- 20. Dinner-50. Drinks- 25. Hotel- 150. The look on his face when I tell him I'm on my period? Priceless.
my debutante medallion kept hitting his balls when i went down on him
We made a late night liquor run, made margaritas and bloody marys and then retreated to opposite sides of the house to drink them. Alone.
You guys make me sad
You misspelled jealous there
Sometimes I wonder if my parents know that I mean horny when I say lonely.
That's the only definition of lonely that I know.
I'll feed you vitamin c from my mouth this weekend. Like a baby bird.
Promise??
Brunch got away from me. I might be a little high.
I don't care how hot she is, her cat has pissed on me twice.
I told my boyfriend that the thing I missed most about him was scratching his balls for him.
just woke up on the floor of my shower...it was still runnning
I don't need to marry the guy. I just need some filthy, shameful wish fulfillment sex and then live out the rest of my life on the bean farm.
I woke up on the green space outside our dorm cradling a watermelon and sucking my thumb. College is crazy man.
After dropping your phone on the ground you got down and sat with it, kissed it and apologized for being so mean
Tanner. All u drink. 10 bckaa. Locked in Porto potty outside. Constructed area. Main strrrreeeett. Fuck. Help. Pleese
I know her cup size but not her name....
There is way too much butt cleavage here for a formal event.
Randomize
