i don't remember but I assumed it was bad when I woke up with directions from his house to mine already pulled up on my phone
How do you say "I'm not pregnant in Spanish?"
We glued Jenga blocks together, called it "magic blocks" and sold it to the stoners for $50 and a bottle of Henny
And yes, in case u were wondering a 25 year old high school agriculture teacher did just hit on me At Walmart bc of my pinata
And when he pulled me off the bathroom floor, he just looked at the cat litter stuck to my chin and said "oh sweetie" and shook his head. I think my dad's officially given up hope.
I threw up in the shower, slipped, and fell in it. Should I try and continue my day or just get back in bed?
Are you having sex right now? Or is the apt just swaying rhythmically on its own? Either way, awesome.
I told her my hands were paint brushes and her vagina was my canvas
i cant believe im seriously wearing his ex girlfriends underwear right now
I used to put Bugles on my penis and pretend it was a wizard.
So I'm dropping a fat deuce at work, and the lock on the stall door slips and the door slides open, when suddenly someone comes in. Now I have two options, I can either get up quickly and try to shut the door quickly (not easy to do with one hand) or I can just sit there and play it off like it's no big deal and I always dump at work with the door open. I chose option two, and it was as awkward as it sounds.
All I need is $1,500, a beach ready body, a bigger dick & this will be the best spring break ever.
I would be down to associate sex w taco bell
We didn't have a place to have sex. So we timed the automatic car wash & spent $9 for 3 minutes and 45 secs of car sex.
i have two papers due tomorrow. contemplating if i should take adderall in my anus for full effects
Randomize