Why are handjobs necessary in class?
Haha so you are never gonna want to meet my mom now...she just found your thong in her front seat
hahaha our party bus just died on the freeway and we're drinking in the center divider. i'm on the roof. i win
I want to punch and suck your dick at the same time. I don't think we have the healthiest of relationships.
Next time we throw a party together I would appreciate it if you didn't try to get my friends to hook up with friends of yours you know have herpes
My Valentine's Day plans just drastically changed... My F buddy just ran into my gf...in my driveway.
All of the texts in my phone just say "BEER". I woke up with glowsticks on my arm. What happened last night?
I still have a scar from the last time she gave me a handjob. There is NO WAY i'll stick my dick anywhere near her again
You take a step back sometimes and are like "when was the last time I was sober?" or "wow I need to stop putting everything in my vagina"
Is this an intervention?
Watch out, there's a giant vagina in the quad running around screaming at people.
It makes showers more interesting trying to drink a gin and tonic and keep soap out of my eyes at the same time.
You need to calm down.
seriously they are like going to hulk burst through. There are perks and downfalls to having big boobs
He asked me for a pic so I sent him a pic of my boyfriends dick.
must go to store soon wiping with panty liner ugh
I mean, who hasn’t been fingered in there back of an Uber?
Randomize
