When we talk. Remind me of these topics, photoshop, my bday, threesomes, and cherekee indians. I swear these are real topics...
New topics to add when we talk, sweden, boxing, and the band journey
In Vegas, have spent the last 48 hours wearing a viking helmet and fanny pack. I consider this to be a career high since drinking is my career
Still workable. Pretty sure i told her i'd eat her out in the woods.
she asked if i had a condom...i said yes...when we finished it wasnt on...told her it was at home on my dresser.
Explain to me how "cheap asian titties" is a complement?
I'm not being over dramatic, but I think my heart is going to stop beating.
Check Facebook. Random dude tagged us in photos from last night dancing at Denny's while eating a sampler platter. 1. How does he have our names, and 2. You said we ate at Tbell.
It's official. 2011 is the year of sport fucking
I love that your nipples always taste like clean laundry.
That's the kind of activity you can only get away with by wearing a lion codpiece
It's time to run my sex life like a basketball team. Got the lesson Clint!
The girl who comes up after me always strips to Lana Del Rey. I didn't think working in a strip club could be any more depressing.
best way to lose double chin? blow jobs. I am fucking hurting.
I left my parents and ran through the airport. I was like I'm not getting stuck in Atlanta tonight and not having sex.
They were shocked that I could handle my liquor so well. I'm half Irish and half Russian. This is what I'm made for
Randomize
