Nipple clamps can be ambiguous
I considered driving home in his mom's bathrobe until i realized i'd have to stop to buy cigarettes
kindergarten is hard when you're hung over.
so i definitely just saw 2 cops high five each other as they were arresting underage drinkers in 5 points.
he even offered to make my bed in the morning.
How do the people at CVS not know your living in their bathroom?
I dare you try and top an Eiffel tower full of Margarita
Late night whataburger runs are great, except if you're the one that gets left black out drunk puking in the backyard drinking from the water hose
She apologized again the next day. I said it was pee under the bridge
Oh man, are we repeating last 4th of July?!
That shouldn't even be a question, it's a tradition now. Hope your manhood is ready.
if happy hour never ends, you’ll never have to eat kale
Knowing there are different types of spiders in different countries and regions makes me never want to travel.
why do guys have to express their feelings when they know your seeing someone else ? I fucked him anyways to make him feel better , and to know what he's missing.
dude you know how i got totally hammered and lost my phone at some frat when i came to visit you two months ago? yeah well someone mailed it back to me in minnesota.. with a picture of a cock as the screen savor
BRB. These cougars are squabbling over my junk and one of them is offering to pay my tuition
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