Ok I love you more. To infumty and beyong.
I am 90% sure the kid in front of me in class is picking his face spots, smelling it, and then eating it. That is a LOT of % sure for something like that.
girls mom is dying from cancer and she msgs me for a booty call. I guess people cope with their situations differently.
Elton John & Lady Gaga just did a duet on the Grammies. How appropriate. He likes cock & she happens to have one.
She was raised with a wonderful home life. I can't do anything with that.
you're the only person i know to use "jizz" and "cute" in the same sentence.
but then i turned into a human whiteboard because i thought it was a good idea to bring out markers
And with me just getting pulled over and you maxing your card out on tennis balls I don't know if we can afford it
Just please never masturbate in my bed again. I'm burning my sheets as I write this.
There is an empty space on my boobs where glow paint should be.
i was mezmorized. she was the most beautiful girl that looked like a boy i ever seen
Want to get high and go thrifting? I'm trying to succeed making my dorm look like a deranged Applebees.
You were, but he disappeared after you said you wanted him to get you pregnant so you'd have a child by the time the Boy Meets World sequel starts
And it's settled. 10 months is the appropriate amount of time before having the dick pic discussion.
Just fell out of the attic onto the garage floor. Okay but might go for an x ray. Smashed one of the kitchen drawers to bits.
Holy Shit Mom
Randomize
