Whats up?
Drunk as a mother trucker with panties on her thumbnail..laying thee down
Stay up. I'm coming home in a little
Ill try..hurry!!!! Thine hour awaits you
Stop. You don't mean that. Tequila might mean that. But you don't mean that.
It's not normal to lose a tooth eating a McDouble.
they named it eva bongoria. i had to hit it based on the name alone.
sarah just described his penis as "like bong-girth." I'm gunna go for it.
He's yummy.
HE'S GAY. AND 40.
Irrelevant.
She slapped his drink out of his hand to get him to leave the bar while he and I were having an intense debate about the lyrics to mmmbop
I don't even know what beauty is right now. I wouldn't even pity fuck me today.
I was giving this guy head and he stopped me to look me in the eyes and say "you have a gift"
According to him, i kept saying "I'm belligerent as SHIT" and tried to run around the house in just my bra and underwear. Thats when they decided to carry me to the car and take me home.
according to the video, you won you first drunken karaoke contest based off of your actual singing abilities and not because you took your shirt! I've never been prouder :)
I can't thank you enough for the well-timed blowjob. What a huge improvement in my outlook on the day.
He facetimed with his son when he was still inside of me. If that's not a dedicated dad I don't know what is
Almost ran out to the street bowl in hand when I hear the ice cream truck pull up outside.
Everything about that text makes me proud to be your sister.
Wearing panties to a party gives you a whole new perspective on life.
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