Well whatever you do have, it sure worked on me.
A Penis?
it's a "shave your legs in the cvs bathroom" kind of night
2 rounds of irish car bombs have already been taken to your 5 year sober anniversary
that's probably because you left your arm in the fishtank for 90% of the night
the night ended with taco bell and tears
I need a new pic for your contact id. Because your boobs popping up when I'm having dinner with my grandma or, ya know, when kids have my phone isn't so good.
I vaguely remember seeing that couple making out in front of that store and i yelled "I ALSO LOVE THE ROCKY MOUNTAIN SOAP COMPANY!"
Just used the handle end of a spatula to get the baggie of coke wedged between my passenger seat. Innovation points?
Stoned stonnnnnnned on the raaaaange
you said something about joining a k-pop band before passing out topless on the trampoline.
I still have to bake cookies and shave my legs so Mike can have MILF & cookies when he gets home.
I don't remember what you did, but I DO remember that i'm supposed to hate you for it.
I don't think we should let her have pot anymore. She ate an entire package of bacon half-cooked and screamed that it was al-dente.
ya well i woke up to my roommate spraying me with windex...
He passed out while I was riding him but stayed hard long enough for me to orgasm. He definitely earned the blow job I’m going to wake him up with in the morning!
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