First thing she said after sex was.. are you baptised by chance?
false alarm. still invincible.
Today a TA in one of my classes told me he thought I was 35 and going back to school as an adult learner. Alcohol is working me.
I realized i make the same noise when i get a blow job as when i eat pizza
You should make cookies and when I get home we can have a slow motion hug and eat them
Lazier than spoon feeding yourself popcorn and debating adult diapers so you don't have to leave the mentalist marathon on tv?
We're doing it in the traditional way of discussing why we dislike each other while sharing a bowl. Just like the natives do.
So looks like I applied to adopt a dog last night. I'm completely ok with this
So Bodhi just sent me a pic of someone's balls with a message that says "I hope you all have a ballin' night." I don't even know what level of friendship to call this anymore.
Oh my god.
The ballsiest level.
I'm about to smoke a joint alone, do you want to FaceTime and pretend you're smoking it too?
Exactly best part of my night he took of his shirt and surprise traveler fanny pack
Orgasms and cereal.... that's what life's about.
That's okay I'm failing college because I'm to busy giving over the pant handjobs in class..
did you make it home?
i'm in a room and it looks like mine :)
hahah close nuff if it isnt
I’m sorry my lady boner messed up your mojo!!
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