dude your alot more fun to hang out around now that your addicted to coke...but seriously you need to stop
I dont think problem is the right word. Problems arent something you enjoy. Life would be too boring without gambling.
He yelled IN THE FACE!! while cumming on my face.
At first I was confused when I woke up with shards of glass and pickle brine in my pants. But then I remembered I hung out with you last night.
I was working er so they smashed a vodka bottle over dan's head so they'd have an excuse to visit
We decided that the paper cups disintegrating was god's way of telling us we had had enough
The only way I could get him to agree to hook up with her is telling him I'd hook up with him next week.
I don't think of it as I'm taking a pole dancing class...its more like I'm making myself recession proof
I wouldn't have puked last night if I didn't inhale straight pepper from you shattering the pepper shaker on the wall.
If you like her enough, bring her with. If not, eloquently cunt punt that bitch through the field goals of life.
U were yelling that I wasn't generous or supportive. Then you kneeled and said this weird prayer about the windows and doors of your life.
I'd introduce you to the guys, but you'd probably make them all fall in love with you
I could do with a Floridian man-harem. Let's do this.
He ordered three small pizzas while I was giving him head.
IM AT A ROOFTOP FUNDRAISER LOOKING OVER THE WHITE HOUSE I WILL NOT RUIN MYSELF
ok so i took my anxiety medication and i'm eating junior mints and i think my vagina will be ok
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