Did I miss anything?
A gay irish pirate, a caveman and hunter s tompson.
so we also did drugs
my mom heard me say 'don't squirt that at me' while me & him were in my room. She then decided to call my aunt and complain to her that she has the sluttiest daughter in town. she refused to believe me when i told her i was talking about gel.
I'm with your mom on this one.
His was the first dick to ever be in my mouth... Of course I'm going to the wedding.
that's not even the weird part though. he already knew where the bathroom was, he might have been here before..
you also choked him out with your legs on the kitchen floor..
It's like I'm snorkeling in an ocean of tequila.
I'm sorry but that single bed couldn't hold all five of us, especially with those boobs.
I should start an etsy shop with all the jewelry and clothes women leave at my house
Post a pic on facebook and see if those same 46 girls find shitting in the bed handsome and adorable
The best part about this city is obvious. Someone saw me crouching by a bar pissing in my leftover Panera bread bowl and they just winked.
I have walked into stripper central, but I'm on the street at 1:00 in the afternoon
It's like the first time your mom catches you masturbating. We both know what she saw. We're just not talking about it...
I mean, you got a giant dick. I've seen lawn gnomes that are smaller.
How hard do you think it would be to make a drinking game out of a Slip-N-Slide? Asking for a friend.
does anyone know where bryan is?
last i saw he was naked, and crying in the bathroom because there was no more booze.
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