You know, as long as there were ice cream breaks, I would totally eat chips for a living.
So pretty much, I was trying to piece last night together and remembered a point where I was pointing to you heart then touching your face. I'm not sure that I ever translated that to "I like your personality better than your looks" but that's what I meant
she took her clothes off and my dick went from =====> to =>
Theres someone in the car behind me eating corn on the cob & talking on the phone
She jerked me off while she drove us back from Denver going 70mph. It was both the scariest and most erotic moment of my life.
right before he busted, he moaned the british are coming.
only on the fourth of july.
come parachute off the vicodin airplane with meee
she kept yelling about wanting tacos, so I gave her a piece of bologna in a tortilla. she didn't know the difference
SORRY! Pervert came out for a bit. BAD PERVERT! BACK IN YOUR HOME!
Is it related to planting your seed? Cause I don't know if you have studied the development of a tiny human, but that is some complicated shit.
Isn't everything in a man's life somehow related to him planting his seed?
Not sure if you're still doing the whole "sleeping with only one person" thing but if you're not we should sleep together when I get back in town tonight.
I would recommend NOT getting ass enhancement shots.
I was a plus one at an intervention for a person I didn't know.
Listen. The next time my first idea in the morning is "hometown buffet and a water bottle full of captain morgan", please make me go back to sleep.
Birthday wine tasting got super shambly super quickly. I am covered in cuts/bruises/terrible life decisions.
Randomize