I want 2 things right now, you or a cig
cig
We should steal a little kid and go to Chucke Cheese
if she leaves who will i have to secretly talk about behind thier back
he drunkenly pissed himself on the deck, in the bathroom, and on my couch within the span of an hour
its like an avodart commercial...maybe he has a growing problem
The best thing he's ever done for me was comment on my profile picture saying "hello boner"
can we meet up so i can piece together the end of my night? for instance, did i jump or fall into a plant?
I do. There's a bald headed guy whose kinda hot. I might rub his head. I've only had 2 beers
Remember that pineapple I soaked in vodka last month? Just found it- nothing is growing on it? Think it's safe?
I'd just like to inform all involved that walking into a liquor store holding a milk crate at the beginning of a night as stock ends badly
Note to self: do not ride giant beanbag chair down stairs.
i just honestly didn't believe you when you said your brother was a fucking clown. ho shit you weren't kidding.
Pizza rolls are incredible. They are like sex, except I have them sometimes
So I sniffed too hard this morning before work and I THINK THE COCAINE JUST STARTED ROUND 2.
What does "mood AF" mean?
Mood as fuck.
Why did you comment that on a video of a gorilla throwing its own shit?
One of my tenants at my fourplex that I own gave me a massive bag of severely dank pot and a brick of cocaine because she didn't have the cash to pay the rent. She might just be my favorite tenant!
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