billy ray cyrus is narrating a show on the history channel. my iq cant decide whether to go up or down.
i wonder if she gts uncomfortable walkin bu when she knows we all know what her pussy tastes like
Just registered some guy for opium withdrawals. WTF opium withdrawals, who does opium anymore.
I told him he didn't want "flip-flop extraction" on his medical history.
I want to see you in more than a weed delivering capacity
After the second day the hotel realized I wasn't responsible enough to have a comforter, so they took it for the rest of the trip.
Finals week has gone away, doo dah doo dah, drink martinis naked day oh da doo dah day
I'm not really into her personality. Not that we've ever looked for personality in women.
That's only a quality to look for in a second marriage.
Katelyn drunkenly ripped the soap dispenser off the wall so we decided to call it quits
Im walking to an ob gyn practice session right now. Literally have to get face first in a middleaged vagina in 10 min.
Stripper with the black hair and lip rings is still asleep. Found out she wasn't lying when she said she was a squirter, it was like splash mountain.
He's basically me if I was an 8-yr-old boy. It's like looking into a pudgy terrifying mirror
That's like.....u just dangled a sex carrot in front of me then took it away!
He just said "I can't wait to penetrate you tomorrow" I sat in silence for a second...he attempted to save it by saying "I can't wait to enter you".
He punched me in the face while giving him road head, because he was driving stick. I shit you not.
Randomize