i don't mind that he's uncut. i like it! it's like a little sweater!
a cock doensn't need a sweater! especially a skin sweater! wtf.
That's like some buffalo bill hannibal lector shit.
Its a sad when the highlight of your day is flicking a booger and actually getting it to stick to your computer monitor.
she likes to give head while listening to britney spears, getting blown by a girl with headphones on is a nice level of separation
i don't even want to say how many boners i've caused this week
There's a big hole in the wall at the dining hall. I hope we didn't do
Looks like a significant portion of my drinking money just became legal fees.
90% sure you snuck in there somewhere, all I really remember is big boobs in my face so I'm assuming it was you.
I will call him whatever I please, including flaccid dick on forehead guy but not limited to watermelon cunt head.
so, she was so drunk she tried stabbing me with a corn dog stick
Though my hair looks fantastic i will unfortunately have to turn down your 4am sex offer
I didn't pay $79 for lingerie for you to cum in 30 seconds
I think clothing becomes optional at the second date! But you seem like a rule breaker
Meeting up with one of your students at your drug dealers house is always an awkward moment
Like I said, all hypothetical...unless, of course, you'd be into that. My heart may skip a beat.
I'm sorry my shit is everywhere... I accidentally got drunk while packing
Randomize
