My mom says you aren't allowed to eat doritos at my house
If immigrants and dwarves find love, why can't I?
I dont like him- his parents were home and he hid me in his closet like anne frank
apparentely "Beer Pong Champ" is not a profession, no wonder they havent called me back......
told ya
FIrst one done
How did it go?
I dunno I taled about women being treated wrong and quoted Ice T. So probably a "c"
He told me he wanted to break up so he could get "closer to God."
Does God suck his dick?
I incognito puked under the VIP table. Did Jersey proud.
naw. unless you want me to sit in a corner, not understand english and eat all of your cheese then i don't think it's a good idea.
I just saw her shopping list. The only things on it are blackberries, hot fudge and condoms. I almost don't wanna know. Almost.
I just found a GIANT thermos of sangria in my sink. I don't know if its still good to drink, but its good to drink.
Might just stay in and drink cuz of the hurricane. Yea I think Wisconsin might be safe but its a good reason to drink.
I assume some self respect is too lofty of a gift idea
"We hooked up and in the morning he emailed me his mix tape"
I told you for Halloween we just need to let the loins free! Let the girth come to us in a flock, drenched with passion!
I feel like it's the kind of place that would appriciate my Aladdin vest
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