Currently looking for a new liver on ebay. Struggle.
Pretty sure I saw a dude across the room give this girl the international hand gesture for "I'm going to fist you later", she seemed ok with it.
I'm sitting by myself in my bra eating a waffle and drinking pineapple rum. gamedaaaayyyyyyy
Hey, no judgement here...this is the girl that threw up on a box of kittens at the magician's house
so the good news is that i can't possibly burn my eyelashes off tonight at the bbq.
I actually don't know if I can stand up. I just know better than to try
Sorry for locking you out after accusing you of eating my Skittles... I realized I was mistaken after just throwing up the rainbow.
Teasing with taco bell is not funny. High or sober.
Def just hooked up with my brother's senior prom date in his bed. Does that make me the worst brother ever?
I swear she lies about being allergic to gluten so she'll get all the jack and not have to drink shitty beer like the rest of us
Drink a bottle I wine by yourself? Treat yo self
I apparently pulled his dick out at the bar and started yelling "DICK PICS IN REAL LIFE!"
He's finally divorcing her, so naturally he tells me that we're not exclusive anymore. His penis 'wants what it wants' apparently.
I have all the porn. Be there soon
Who is this?
It was like Strip poker and blow, but with Yu-Gi-Oh cards
Randomize
