you want to go make fun of the strippers on try out night
i got kicked out last time for laughing
I just farted so loud that my cat got so scared he fell off the couch.
shes a 6ft ginger. she brings nothing to the table except for awkwardness
Standing on the street at 6am in Hong Kong drinking beer. Watching all the hookers do the walk of shame from our hotel. How did I get here? Maybe all my bad choices in my life were really good ones?
There is no way that a naked man in your kitchen can be explained-away as a "misunderstanding."
Your CAR. Is in a LAKE. I'd say "a big mess" is a pretty conservative description of the situation.
We turned on "find my friends" and watched her progress. Got concerned when she didn't move for an hour on Adelaide, turned out a booty call was made, then she went back to the bars.
I need to stop getting drunk and telling people it isn't "about them."
I just want to return to LA when the weed and dick is plentiful.
the amount of 23-year-old guys who have seen me naked is starting to get a little worrying
I told her I was going to masterbate myself into a coma... We have another date on Thursday.
After 2 minutes he came and said, "thanks for everything". I can't wait to hear what he says next time when I do more than just lay there.
Dude it's 6 am and you just invited me to a hotel with a shit ton of coke. Best morning ever
It's a shame, really, because he's got the cock of a horse... And the personality of dry toast.
I cannot believe I am seriously having a conversation about my best friend's sexual prowess as a dream lesbian.
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