Halloween 2010: the NuvaRing girls. You're Thursday. We'll walk into the party chanting "Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, Friday, Saturday, Sunday, Everydaaay".
Ive been sitting around naked watching magic on youtube.
Dude I could put my dick between the gap in her teeth.. This is the last time we are hanging out with Kentucky girls
I'm too tired to go all the way tonight, especially if you're going to quote Katy Perry at me during
No. If you are gonna end this, you are gonna do it right. Not by getting bombed and falling on a strange penis. That was the old you.
I definitely did a line of something I don't know with a Pagan biker. I make good decisions.
Just described your amazing cock to a complete stranger. I am officially the worst wingman (chick) ever.
Just wanted to say a big ole FUCK YOU for coming out to mom the day before I have to drive with her for 6 hours. Ass hat.
I'm smoking a bowl with matches and a candle while my mother washes dishes downstairs. I thought adulthood was supposed to be different.
What!? It's 7:30am on gameday. This keg is not going to drink itself.
That's what jaeger bombs out of teacups will do to you.
You don't know true terror until you get stuck in a porta potty while frying your face off.
Why is this not the first time I’ve seen the mugshot of someone I’ve slept with
I just got a hug from a random kid in my class. he said I was a champ at the bar last night..someone help me.
I remember reading the word "lift" so I did. The alarn went off, and I thought to myself "what dumbass pulls the fucking fire alarm?" and then I realized it was me...
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