just do him I won't tell jon
um i'm guessing you meant to send this to tina, thanks for the support in our relationship you whore
Black lace...the rest is up to ur imagination
They wont let us in. Theyve some sort of no Daft Punk costume rule
Dear yesterdays makeup, Thank you for always being there when I stay up late binge drinking on weeknights and am running late to work Friday morning. You're the best.
I found a girl on our couch wearing lederhosen this mornig... I dont know if i should be impressed or ashamed
I'm pretty sure there's seven mailboxes in the bathtub...
I love Japanese schoolgirls with short skirts riding bikes on windy days.
You're never coming back, are you?
I finally won that bet on when the anorexic girl would pass out at the gym. You owe me 10 now
Tough to say exactly how to play this. I just know people don't like surprises when genitals are involved.
he asked me to "shake his dick" when he introduced himself, playing naked football with you in our living room. $100 says you two get married one day.
I tried to talk to him, but he didn't recognize me at first. I had to show him the top of my head and then he remembered.
She's crying about either her ex boyfriend, her one night stand, or her own puke. None of those is worth the tears.
HOW MANY BOYS NOT ONLY APPROVE OF YOUR PLAN TO BECOME POCAHONTAS, BUT WANT TO MAKE SURE YOU DO IT RIGHT? One, the answer is one, and he is the best and if anyone ever tries to steal him I can assure you they will never be heard from again
Just cried to my husband about how much I'm going to miss my boyfriend... Maybe marriage is going to work for me after all
i opened the door and you were passed out on my doorstep wearing ugly shorts and cuddling a pinnapple, i dont know what happened to you.
Randomize
