so chris just stuck his hand between rachel's legs and yelled 'TROUT!' and we were like...you're wasted
this whole healthcare thing got me thinking.. without knowing it my parents are now going to be paying for my dealer to be able to live..
Do you think it would be a good idea to mention in my admissions essay that I was the guy that streaked across the soccer field last year?
Doubtful. That seems irresponsible. The 4th will kill you if you stopped drinking until then. Let's think logically.
I understand where he's coming from but I don't want this alcohol to revolve around relationship
Wait
Hangover Status: I've been bedridden longer than that kid from The Secret Garden. It's not looking good.
You really realize what your life's become when you're sitting alone in the house crying in a santa hat and pjs getting stoned on christmas eve before noon.
His balls are like really small, like dog sized balls. It was a weird discovery. Ever done a guy with dog sized balls?
she had a dildo shaped like a dolphin. she will forever be known as Flipper
He sent me nudes and then a text asking if I tried the new Cantina Bowl from Taco Bell. He sure does romance right, doesn't he?
You just get me
I'm the wind beneath your wings, bitch
i'm so glad to be in bed i'd like to thank the acadermy
It's just really funny to hear them talk about March for Life when literally every single one of those girls has had an abortion
WHY THE FUCK DOES RICKY'S BROTHER GET AN ENTIRE POT OF PASTA FOR BEING SHIRTLESS AND ALL I GET IS ARRESTED?!
My boobs are too perky to pay that much for a car
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