I got wasted for the 1st time and I sat in a fridge for 2 hours and a trash can?
why would she put his p in her m after it was in her a? that's gross
its gross she let him put his p in her a nevermind his p in her m after p in her v. cleaning up is necessary
i put my m on your v after my p was in your v. no big deal
So tasty. Tasty like a vagina with ninjas in it
We're lucky we aren't prostitutes by now. Whats the etiquette for returning a pair of heels with blood on them?
He panicked, you ducked and I was coming off a 3 day coke binge. It was no one's shining moment.
there's a guy pushing a keg up the street in a shopping cart. you have to love graduation
Your excessive judging is making this uncomfortable
oh, i've got big weekend plans. on an unrelated note, do you think viagra will work if the guy is roofied?
MY roomie made me a chinese name- it's supposed to mean 'the girl of a thousand sins.'
Some lady just walked up to me in the bar and proclaimed that I looked like a "shady motherfucker." Can't argue with that one.
Imma need a double jack on the rocks and a BJowsky from the hot bartender.
Yes I said BJOWSKY. Pronounced "buh jow skii".
Do not ever get that redhead chem major high. Gave her a magic brownie and she sat in a corner and literally cried about organic chem. Never again.
My husband gave me a key to his house. I thinks this means we're getting kinda serious.
I will go to bed dreaming of sexy Olympians carting me on a throne to the beach where they feed me pizza and champaign and massage my head/wash it like the hair dresser does.
I can't. I'm going camping this weekend. I do have a life outside of your dick.
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