so i was creeping on him today and there was like nothing new except he became a fan of getting dome
i wish i could be like. "i like giving dome, lets be friends"
worst. lesbian. ever. i'm not sure she knows a clit from a pencil eraser.
i think the date started going downhill when i mentioned how many therapists i have
Let's get back to talking about you giving me a blow job.
dizzyuy bat. 3.453 lkos. hoit sx, now im single. blackouteed
He still lectured me about forgetting shit. Than he said he's gonna paint me green so I can stand in a corner and be a plant.
Managed to discreetly puke out of a moving streetcar window, in front of no less than a dozen people. Nobody saw/said anything. I feel like a legit local now.
I don't know if I have the sustained energy level for partying hard
Not a choice. You are mistaking my comments as options. My statements are facts. This is what is happening.
THIS NIGHT WILL NOT GO DICKLESS
Dude that girl I hooked up with Tuesday is in lecture. I told her I was from the Dominican visiting my cousin and was leaving the next day. Hiding under my hood and hangover.
Also I feel I should tell you last night when I came home I fell into my laundry hamper and woke up in a pile of my clothes
Not now. Out of camp chairs. Carving a new one with a chainsaw. Mushrooms are starting to kick and I gotta get this done NOW.
I was masterbating to some porn on my phone and my mom decides to text me "are you okay?" I mean i was doing great until you cock blocked me mom..
My cats name is now jello shot. How much do you love me right now?
You passed out in my backseat like a legitimate infant. A really drunk, really horny infant
Randomize
