I'm in the mood to be taken advantage of ;-)
I was high enough to think chocolate sauce on bagel bites was a good idea
Because of no shave november, it's no boys december... pay back
you kept typing in answers.com, why are the state police calling my house, expecting an answer
You were sitting at the bus stop holding hands with some Polish girl you just met, who was just as drunk as you were, and you kept trying to light your Kit Kat and smoke it.
my dad just told me he wants a furry wall in the house... i'm proud and concerned
she chased the tour bus screaming I BET YOUR DICK IS THE SIZE OF YOUR MICROPHONE STAND. i think its safe to say were never getting vip passes again.
I vaguely remember having a 'grass is greener' conversation about our nipples. Dream or beautiful reality?
Beautiful, beautiful reality
We've gotten 3 pitchers already by trading for CUPCAKES
If it involves mee putting on a bra and discontinuing my 11 am drinking my answer is a polite fuck YOU
I figured it out! The supermoon explains how I managed to have sex with 3 dudes in 3 nights without leaving the apartment.
I love you. Doing a double. Going to die. It will be painful. Let the world know i partied. God, did i party.
He went down on me for like 30 min and honestly half the time I thought about those videos where people can smash watermelons with their legs and I just wanted to do that to his skull
I don't see why I have to pay for it.
your head went through the window, you're pretty much obligated to pay for it.
Soooo, hypothetically, how long would roommates have to sleep together before its considered dating...
Randomize
