What are you drinking?
Shitty Coors light. OM NOM NOM TASTES LIKE HIGH SCHOOL
I dumped him because he's never seen star wars. I'm certain I did the right thing.
I had another sleeping on concrete incident.
I ride home in a shopping cart. Don't at like you aren't jealous.
I can only be a whore so many days outta the week.
Samesies
Either you made a spaghetti vodka smoothie last night, or you puked in the blender.
Making jello shots drunk, i apologize ahead of time if they are too strong Can't taste anything.
Threesome in a minivan. New low
he said i balance and complete him. i feel sick
Oh god. It's like a broken faucet. My guts sound like a bilge pump clogged with golf balls and cake frosting.
She said she'd heard about my nickname in high school. Apparently sledgehammer isn't as popular as you'd believe...
I was just crying my tits off and he was just sitting there listening. I was an open book of embarrassing life stories.
Wine is not your friend.
If we all have the time, and the weather permits, and you have no plans, we should have another go at Operation Get Our Carless Friends Laid. All the lonely people will be out. We can take our lonely people out too.
Its 9 am & i've been cleaning for 6 hours now with occasional crying bursts and two cocktails. Adulting 101.
I may have been bent over an elementary school lunch table a few weeks ago. Don't judge.
Randomize
