we ended up doing shots out of those medicine cups..swine flu finally did something good for me
I just saw a fat chick walking across campus talking to herself and licking her lips. Diet season is scary.
What happened to chicks over dicks?
That rule does not apply to 9 inch dicks..
Just coerced a Santa to buy me a handle. Tis the season.
I may be a little fuzzy on this, but I think at some point I said something about being a generous lover.
That girl is nothing but trouble. She's 40% red hair and 60% daddy issues.
Bartenders are not toys. I repeat, bartenders are not toys.
Yaaaayyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy! It has more than one y so my intentions to sleep with you after the drink special ends are clear
He pulled over in the Compass Bank parking lot so I could dry-heave, but I decided I couldn't vomit there because "I bank here."
my nose is crying tears of wow.
She's astronaut crazy. She will wear Depends and drive 12 hrs non-stop if you swipe right.
Challenge accepted
4 pharmacies and not one had Plan B. If this is gods way of telling me it's time for a child, he can fuck off.
Just threw up in a baggy on the airplane. The guys next to me clapped and bought me a jack and coke.
Livin the dream
Your sister just admitted to being a " much bigger bitch" than you. So you've got that going for you, which is nice.
Lol, perhaps. But the drinks are so cheap, the music is better, and the bartenders and bouncers all know my name. I can't abandon it, even if it is a gay bar, its still my Nirvana.
Randomize
