its sad that the first thing i assume is that ur trying to indirectly tell me you fucked on a breakfast table
by asking you if you bought one for the apartment?
I asked her if she had any t-shirts of bands that didn't suck. I got a Sublime shirt and my answer.
from all the glitter we used it actually looked like a disco stick
Just saw ur first draft of ur suicide note.
You spelled "worthless" wrong.
The boys are giving me the exam answers and I don't even have to expose my body..yayy engineering!
and that's why he's hiding in the taco suit
I just realized I am holding a beer in 133 out of 134 photos of me on my facebook page.
Nobody is perfect
I'm at Waffle House wearing one of the paper hats in the other
I knew shit got real when the pinapple was gone and people were just passing around the core and gnawing on it.
Look dude I'm sorry I used your bong to snorkel in my bathtub last night
Totally sleeping on a bloodstained mattress tonight. I love life's little adventures.
I will pre answer that I did not see it the fun way. He was peeing outside.
Nothing says casual like stairwell bjs
Dude I should have just gone home with the guy with dreads and the cat
The guy got mobbed on, all hell broke loose. About 20 cops showed up, and this kid somehow convinced a cop that letting him pee in front of him is justifiable. This guy could sweet talk Hellen Keller, he was THAT good
The last thing I remember is trying to chug the rest of the everclear, running through a fence, and laying down in the snow. I hurt.
Randomize
