i was so high last night that i actually googled "how to get un high"
if you ask that question again our friendship is over
And then she said we stopped for a train and i tried crawling out the back window.. again, i dont remember this.
tequila makes her clothes fall off
wow Mom, sounds like youre having a good time
NoDDING MY HEAD LIKE uyuEAH MOViUNG MY HiPS LioKe YEAhhhhhhhhhhh
wow.
So I'm at planned parenthood and there are 5 people here from Friday's party.
Nope it's him. He's whispering to himself and buying asparagus.
I just got hit on by my highschool french teacher. I need to stop going to this bar.
Theres also beggin' strips and a dog bone in the corner...nooo signs of there being a dog though.
I thought he was kidding when he said pretend to be a dunkin donut delivery women. This is the last time I ever role play.
i got us a cheese tray and a bottle of whiskey
ugh yes i love our date nights
Went to anytime fitness at 3:34 am drunk after the the bar and getting whataburger. Lifted weights with my cheeseburger between my knees. That's called DEDICATION.
We got back from Mcdonalds and literally 5 minutes of being in your room, you wanted to go back because "We haven't been yet."
"my nose is broken but I'm beer pong champ so it evens out really"
He wants to pour butter pecan flavored coffee creamer on me and lick it off. I'm like, dude, gross. French Vanilla ok? Ugh.
If I could figure out how to do him with his wranglers on you would never see me again.
Randomize
