Wow so rude I was trying to have an orgy later but whatever
I think having sex with you would be a great treat for us
you guys got to bein so kosher and go with the flow
You bet me 100 dollars that the Raiders would win the super bowl this year. I have it on tape.
he peed everywhere. it's like having a puppy.
I just past a guy who was biking and double fisting wit glass beer bottles. That is what i call talent
Why is your signature on my underwear?
I was just informed that you are the reason for my 2 missing front teeth.
Iranian Rapper, camaroonian basketball player, mexican i forget and indian doctor....this one looks the best on paper.
Women are fucking wierd. I have forgotten this. Divorce papers should come with a handbook.
All i want to do is drink fuck and cry... you dont have to cater all three its more like the saddest choose your own adventure ever
I should rephrase... I'm trying to not sit on other peoples faces besides my boyfriends.
Just woke up. Naked. Under an animal pelt. With a girl. I've never met her. She's pretty naked too.
I traded him cumming in my face for a year for a Disney annual pass. One giant leap back for feminism, one small step for the adult child Disney fan.
It's settled. One of us is going to bang her brother. The world demands justice and he's hot. We'll be the justice league if it were made of alcoholic whores
Woke up with a lip tattoo that says "fake news" in case you're wondering about my wellbeing
I just threw up on the way to class. Legit, on the sidewalk by psych building.
THAT WAS YOU? Psych prof just pointed out the window and said "that kids, is why you don't pregame before class"
Randomize
