I've come to the conclusion that if I was an old man, I would perve around in short gym shorts for kicks.
can you come get me and bring me shorts and a shirt
maybe shoes and water too
oh and maybe a noose to hang myself
Just think, the more you drink, the more options you'll have of people you want to hook up with.
Passing las posas road. In a world of pain. Im trying to piss in a bottle through the hole in my crotch. I wish i had a bigger dick.
The highlight of my Saturday night was singing along to the sound of music alone in my room.
you tipped EVERY employee at white castle
That's fun. I just masturbated and I swear my vagina creaked.
The couch is in the bathroom. I don't understand how that is even possible. I couldnt even fit that shelf thingy through the door. Come help. I am about to pee my pants.
He told me about how he pissed his pants last weekend like it was a normal part of conversation. Within 10 minutes I was going home with him. I think he put me under some kind of spell.
So his mom walked in the kitchen while I was sucking him off and just casually suggested that "I'd need a glass of water after that"
I want to go out and have good clean fun.
Ok, but that does not include Bud Light Platinum and your vagina.
I think there's an ice cream truck out back, but there's no way I can get pants on in time to catch it
we talked about the guy being eaten by the anaconda.. Then I proceeded to blow him
I just got CPR certified, don't make me need these skills so soon
If I slept with her my dick would come out glittery
coward.
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