I solve my problems like an adult, at the strip club drinking on a work night.
Apparently when he woke up I was tripping my face off. Everytime the cat meowed I would meow back. This went on for several hours.
I'm in the dining hall. that same guy is here again, the one who sits alone and talks to his silverware.
I ended up taking shots of whiskey and chasing them with potato wedges, I have never felt more Irish
There is a large, jolly black gentleman in the parking lot of my appartment complex yelling about 5am jelly doughnuts. I want to be where he's at.
there is a guy passed out on top of me and i don't know what to do. help if you're awake? was anyone anyone expecting someone? maybe he found the wrong room?
I dont' remember leaving St. Cloud, getting home, or apparently directing traffic in the middle of the fucking street while black out drunk.
jesus, I think that canada gold metal game has completely changed all rules of acceptable drinking habits, I was fucked untill noon and I just got invited to go party when I get off work...at 600am...and NO ONE understood why i was hesitant
I just shotgunned a beer and my lipstic didnt BUDGE. MERICUHH
where will you be at 9:30 tonight?
piledriving you in your roommate's bed?
Thanks for fingering me to orgasm during Wu-Tang Clan
he just ran into my room in his giant penis costume yelling "supercock to the rescue"... I am still in total shock
You can either drink his whiskey or be a bitch. Doing both is just mean.
How did you interpret 'wheat thins' from 'vaginal trauma'?
Ahh yes. I lost my pants and swimming suit and phone charger. And I've found out who has them all even while hungover. Successful day. Nice party too.
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