so high. i feel like my whole body is a boner
my girlfriend just informed me I need to get tested and so do you
girlfriend?
thats the last time i clean cum out of my retainer.
One of my bosses just told me she's having communication problems because mercury is in retrograde this month. I think she's serious.
u know what's depressing? a picture of an owl without a graduation cap
This last weekend single handedly took me off the liver transplant list
I just remembered we said the Lord's Prayer before we went out last night.
I feel like im in a tornado of daylight savings, tequila and death
The timing couldn't have been better if I planned it. His mom walked away, I vomited in their mulch, and then his mom came back and offered me bread.
I blacked out after you got about 8 goldfish out of the tank and put them in your pockets. We're not allowed back. It was a sucky Walmart anyway...
Last I remember we played rock paper scissors for who would fuck the guy with cowboy boots on and I won..
so when he he finally wandered back into the room it was with a pound of cream cheese which he ate in 5 minutes flat and then passed out
How much do souls cost? I feel like I need one if those.
Saw my drug dealer at Easter mass with his family so that was weird
You have the perkiest tits in all of North America. You're fine.
Randomize
