Come home. Power Hour by yourself is only fun for the first 10 minutes.
Well you broke that rule when you put it in your mouth.
Dude turns out her best friend is lesbian...there is no wingman for this situation
i've met an abundance of virgins and guys who where flip flops, i thinks there's a correlation
Everything that you guys said happened came back to me. like a tidal wave of regret.
I need to find a more grown up way of dealin with a hangover at the office than pringles and mountain dew at 8:30 am...
You straddled the banister and fell down the stairs, then proceeded to crawl back up them, I think you need to lay down
It was like inception, a dream, in a dream, in the back of a dodge charger.
Well it's like a wise man once told me: "If you're going to shave your balls, don't do it hungover."
So how do I get back in good graces for trying to trade you for superbowl tickets?
lesbians are really intense tho, she made me take her eye makeup off and told me she was going to eat me for breakfast
He slept outside in his hammock, and then took a lawn chair with him in the shower because he was too drunk to stand up.
As we were walking to her place she stole a pizza from the delivery guy's car and when we got home she grabbed a slice, two beers, removed her pants, and said "call of duty?" im going to marry her
I hooked up with a sophomore, passed out at midnight, and apparently drunkenly peed on Nicole's wedding invitation
Between falling off a shelf on to a concrete floor and sex with you - i may never walk again.
Randomize
