All I remember is yelling at him to admit he liked Bon Jovi, then accusing him of giving love a bad name.
I just had a 2 1/2 hr conversation about the pros and cons of taping your ballsack to your taint, which then led into the unveilling of lady gaga being a hermaphrodite.
Am I a whore if I make out with a boy just so michelle can't?
He said he wanted to have kids with me so they could grow up to be professional linebackers. Not. A. Complient.
The working title of my paper? "Tailgating: A Big Clusterfuck of Kids Who Dont Actually Give a Shit about Football"
She refused to give me a hand job while we were watching a war movie saying she didn't wanna disrespect the soldiers
He upper decked the toilet, got himself lit on fire 6 times and lit 4 other people on fire in the course of 3 days.
I think I just found part of a tooth on my bed... What goes on in here?
So much to do, haven't done anything except hook up with sailors and work on my tan.
We need to be on the same page regarding the 3some this time. No more "one of us should probably leave" moments.
I'll come hang out with you guys later, but right now my parents aren't home and I have to take full advantage of being able to watch porn on full blast.
I think I was just hit on by Jesus Christ. This is not okay. Bad Touch. I NEED AN ADULT!
Calm the hell down, it's just stoner Bob.
It's one PM on a Saturday and I'm sitting here drinking Jack, eating a block of cheese and playing Minecraft. Please tell me you can come drag me to a bar.
I just realized it's officially fall..I had sex while watching Halloween
I just my had my first cup of coffee in a week. I think I might orgasm.
Randomize
