I wish I could drop acid with the muppets
I am like the Mr. Miyagi of queefs.
other girls like to lick balls but none of them live for it like u do
some dude is stoned out of his mind in my calc class. just shouted that the teacher was a genius cause he got rid of so many numbers
It's nice to see a girl prepared for the walk of shame. She brought headphones
I would do laundry with you but I vaguely remember swallowing all my quarters last night as some kind of trick.
My dealer's mom died on christmas eve. Is it too soon to see if he's holding?
im afraid if i stop breathing i will turn into a porcupine
I would convert to being a Republican and Mormon just to sleep with Romney's sons. The things I would to do them.
We got kicked out of the ice rink last night for drinking and checking strangers... but they let us keep the beer
this st patricks day sucks
ill send jameson via bank tube 150+ miles
She bought my penis dinner and beer last night. Her words
Got a 72 hour restraining order. Can we meet monday? Let me know!
I just thought I should tell you that I always know what you are doing. Everywhere. Every time. -Your loving Mother
It’s a good thing I’m the only one in the office today. My boy toy stopped by and now there is jiz all over my desk and couch
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