New pre-game routine....wal-mart bathrooms...quality beers for free...hallelujah
i just found a cheeto on my floor and ate it. i might still be drunk.
who the fuck is that kid sitting with you...
I don't have any fucking idea. I woke up and he was there. I'm kinda creeped out.
He skyped me to learn how to roll a joint and for us to masturbate together. And you said a long distance relationship wouldn't work.
Had a drag queen carry me to the car. So I'm told...
apparently it's a turnoff if you ask a guy why he thinks he needs to use magnums
THIS IS THE EMERGENCY BOOZE SYSTEM. I AM EN ROUTE TO DEWITT WITH A FIFTH OF TEQUILA. THIS IS NOT A TEST
I haven't been motivated enough for a shirt. And only half the day was bra-worthy.
Not after That Night. No. I hate tequila. And it hates me. Very mutual hateship going on.
DOMA is dead. I'm definitely going to be the last of our friends to get married now.
Walgreens has pop rocks. Be prepared to get your dick sucked.
We'd like to invite you to our threesome! Lingerie is encouraged and drinks will be provided. Next Friday, roommate night, my bedroom. Hope to see you there!
Is it fucked up to venmo someone for plan-b?
While walking to class I was handed a red bull, condoms, and a mini bible. I love my school.
omg girl... i cut your hair last night. tell me it looks okay!? i saw hair on the counter and i said ohhh nooo
Randomize
