How young is too young to ask my kid to make me a drink?
Ive had to apologize to every girl i know today because of you
my ass has officially been on the floor of every fraternity on this campus
and who said we didn't have goals?
well now i know if i ever need to drive puke and talk on the phone at the same time i can
Worst night here by far. And ive slipped in my own piss so thats saying something
Did you not learn anything for "HERPES SCARE 2010".........
we cut her off and put her in bed but by the time we got back to the drinks she was already there shirtless. she's the topless tequila ninja
Got a thumbs up from a trucker for doing lines on the interstate. God bless america.
Can't tell if its the LSD or if that demon man just stared at my penis. Cleveland is a weird place. All true stories.
he can get married early and ruin his life but he sure as hell isn't ruining mine with a shitty bachelor party
How about we just have a naked taco night instead?
You told us that you were going to become a 'new man' and threw your tv set out of a window.
I just got the most majestic image of a potato sack full of dildos getting whipped at your head in slow motion.
Just realized I chose a bacon cheeseburger over sex last night
im looking at the positives. number one it stopped me from hooking up with vince infront of his girl, number two it gave me something to do instead of throwing up and number three i fuckin rocked his world
Randomize
