But i just feel like he will pull it out and ill panic. I mean its fairly basic. Up and down. But i feel like ill just freak out.
16 and pregnant actually makes me really happy that i'm gay
Ill pay your DUI fine if you just come see me nooooowwwww
no. its 2:30am and im not going to jail for a booty call
fuck you guys, stop putting fake babies in my car the cops came again.
The guy in the cast riped the tap off the keg and hit steve with it
I'm going to have to start sleeping with my keys taped to my stomach.
I let him fuck me in a batman costume. Don't talk to me about needing to read fifty shades gray.
I told you he wasn't attractive.
Do you think I cared? I was wiping myself with a scarf..
Sneezing cum all over the table was not the highlight of the family reunion if that tells you anything
Nothing too major over here lately. Just had a date with an ex-internet porn star turned lawyer. He said: "at my 3rd burning man I taught a workshop on BDSM" and I knew it was going to be a fun night.
I just did a walk of shame on my own block. one of the old neighbors saw and greeted me "good morning, girl next door"
Actually, lets be honest. I will probably keep calling him the pastor because it brings me joy using pastor and fuck buddy in the same sentence.
Ever since I got to LA my dream self has been having sex with way too many rabbi's.
Change of plans & whoring it up tonight
Hey man, he's too drunk to remember what you said. What drugs are we buying and when should we expect them?
Randomize