he was so hot that i framed the used condom. it's not trash, it's art.
Give me one situation where peeing in your garage could be a bad idea
He was drunk at Denny's at 5 am saying how Dear John was the worst movie he has ever seen... eyes filled with tears.
Just gave advice in krystal burger while holding and pointing with a corona to a 3 year old, told her to enjoy her stroller time while it lasts. The mom pushed her away fast.
why do the even put the "Please drink responsibly" on tequila ads? like has anything responsible ever come from tequlia. No. never.
I think i can make this amish girl legitimately hot.
Should I tell them about my ticket for possession or about how I'm shitting blood? Which one will gain the most sympathy?
therea a video of her dad walking in while i screamed "lets have a fashion show!" and fell off the table
But mostly the blowjob in the airport bathroom was what I was laughing at.
I can't help but feel like we would be friends still if my phone didn't always capitalize BUTTLOAD...
Just watched a guy get through airport security with a full bottle of captain morgan. In my head the entire airport cheered.
Welcome to drink and talk like a Russian afternoon.
Pirate drinking day will be planned for shortly
I approve this so hard.
He woke up, yelled "RALLY!" and then puked in my glove compartment
So none of you told me my tits were popping out of my shirt for three hours?
We told you. Repeatedly. You said you made it look good.
You never know true fear until you're on your period in a house full of white furniture.
Randomize
