Deadliest Catch is NOT foreplay
Pretty sure I just has te same conversation as you. He suggested I get, sell, and fuck the hoes, and once all was said and done, that I should refer afforementioned hoes to him, to perform felatio.
my boss said she was surprised to see me this morning. i told her there's a time in a girls life she has to give up day drinking in order to make money for next weekend's alcohol. she looked so proud, i think i might get a raise.
she screamed "my eye!" and it brought me a surge of bad memories. except she was yelling about a lemon.
I wonder if he has realized that I have poured all if those shots he bought into the tip jar
Lost my key. Fell asleep on the doorstep and got woken up by host grandma poking me with a broom.
I blacked out at the bar, and blcked in getting a handjob on a roller coaster. Sober me is jealous of drunk me.
Ye. Looking like it's about to be one of those mythical responsible weekends
My roommate just walked in with a case of beer locked himself in his room and told us he was going to masturbate his feelings away...
I hung my underwear from the tree in his front yard. Consider my territory marked.
day drinking caused me to be in bed at a decent time. can't complain.
It tasted better than Jesus's hair.
I'm storing dick pics, so basically if I'm still single after residency...ur gonna get bombarded. It's gonna be a blizzard of dicks.
Feel free to keep your blizzard of dicks to yourself.
hey im sorry i made fun of the color of your sheets, but like it was all i could focus on during sex because they were just THAT UGLY
I had to remind him last night as he had his arm around me, "We hook up, we don't cuddle!"
Randomize
