You can't wash away shame.
I can try.
You told me alcohol would be the death of you then ordered 10 shots of tequila.
I should have kept drinking, a coma can't be as bad as this hangover
I got kicked out of a mexican restaurant last night for being too drunk. This is getting dangerously close to rock bottom
The gym is handing out free condoms this week, motivation to work out this week?
We made out for three hours. Then she said she didn't sleep with redheads and left the party. So yes, I'm still drinking.
Sober me does NOT approve of what went on in my pants last night.
Can u check his last FB check in, then come pick me up from there. Blame it on the tequila
The fool I made of myself at the Ugly Christmas Sweater party last night was surpassed this morning when I walk of shamed 6 miles at 7am with one mysterious wet leg and no pants on. I think my mom saw me and waved.
I just peed in a flower pot on the veranda while crying and holding a drink
WHY WONT HOT GETMAN MAKR PUPR WITH ME!!!!???!?!!
What! You have to go to class. Otherwise, you're wasting money that could have been spent on weed. Gotta get that shit in perspective.
And now I have a massive dip in and a Bloody Mary that would catch on fire if you put a flame close to it, with no pants on... At 8:15Am. Being single is pretty legit
In bathroom. Hand in air with cell phone. Help.
I'm at the point in my life where I'm gonna sell my eggs for cash
Randomize
