My new storm is the chrons
The only reason I needed a new one is bc I threw up on my other one(248): And since Verizon doesn't have a throw up test, I was eligible for a new one
The chance that I have herpes may have made me find god
Heated debate on which is worse. Pissing your pants or puking all over yourself
Would you like me to write a persuasive essay on how you should let me suck your dick?
Bartending School is so much more enjoyable now that I realized I was in rehab at this time last year.
he just voluntarily told me he was uncircumsized.. and that his favorite color was blue.
The meeting is at the same hotel we go to for sex. Avoiding eye contact with all the staff there.
he's wearing our apron and eating a pb and oreo sandwich. and calling the oreos "topless" since he took their tops off...
Complete silence. Background Willy Wonka music. An empty back of Lay's BBQ chips. These are the ingredients for an extreme acid trip.
Whiskey and an unstable home life is apparently the fountain that 20-something boys like to drink from.
This gem of a conversation has been brought to you be weed
hey if you're going to the hospital do you wanna pick me up a taco on your way back
Why were you twerking to, "The Wheels on the Bus"?
Lol for real, I'm Kylie Jenner "this is my year of realizing things" right now
69'd by candlelight when the power went out.
Randomize
