i'd rather walk the sahara in a snuggie with no water than take a bicycle cab
thats it. im googling how to make you boobs smaller. this is getting out of control.
is it gross that my labia hangs so much that guys can't find my clit?
I apparently took a 45 minute shower, and became best friends with his mom.
like literally i think i'm sweating out semen right now
Fell into a man hole last night. I've been bleeding since 11pm. Got kicked out of the bar for being bloody.
he just ordered a side of pineapple and winked at me. too much for a first date. come get me.
I need input, can I pre-game my cat scan?
I was rolling balls and tried to donate blood as an act of kindness to the sick person who would receive it
Oh and I ate all of your Cinnamon Toast Crunch. Consider it part of your reparation payment for accidental anal insertion. I may continue to collect payments until I am no longer sore.
We split an eighth of shrooms and went ice fishing. It didn't get weird until I caught one and we both started crying.
I think you should just bang him and get it out of your system.
That's what you say about everyone.
My disapointment is making my balls hurt :(
honestly i've never been more attracted to you than when you threw up on my floor
Having Father’s Day on Pride weekend is always so awkward. “Hey dad just calling to say I love you.” While I’m navigating my way through a pop up pool at a bar riding a penis floatie. Happy Father’s Day.
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