maybe we dont have boyfriends because we dont have tans
so i completely puked my brains out. a lot. he held me up so i could brush my teeth. then we proceeded to hook up for the next four hours.
he's a keeper
Apparently when he woke up I was tripping my face off. Everytime the cat meowed I would meow back. This went on for several hours.
Just found the book "How to Stay Christian in College" on my roommates desk. At a loss for words...
I just sold my mom a dimebag. Should I feel scared or sucessful?
There was a canoe full of alcohol. It was literally a boat load of fun
We're cuddling on the couch that me and his brother had sex on...this feels wrong
Can we dedicate this weekends marathon sexcapades to all the haters?
Um, you were throwing up the shocker symbol in front of all of the wedding guests during the best man's speech. No wonder the groom thinks we're bad
Because Kyle had a tattoo kit at his house and I wanted one and all he could draw was a mustache or a stickman on fire
I really really need to have and out of body experience just so I can talk to myself about this shit that I'm doing with my life.
I never imagine I'd say this, but can I ask Jeff for the butt plugs back even though it was a gift and we broke up?
Come get me...at gazebo by side entrance....im passed out in a bush...this is a Bar A bouncer texting for your buddy
color coded lube a great way to organize my bootie calls
may or may not have snorted a line of tums... wtf.
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