Hey kate, how is it?
sloppy...it's emily. kate just tried to do a keg stand. they dropped her. we're leaving.
just spent all of my last class as a college student, vomiting in the bathroom. its moments like these i will cherish
Pants on the Ground is the theme song of my life
They let you pick the name that they announce for you at graduation. The professional world needs to prepare itself for papa smurf mcdonald.
And then i had a penis in each hand. It was magical.
Sex tent. say it aloud its amazing. promise you we rnt stoned.
I just tipped the cab driver with pistachio nuts. And he loved it.
Just sharpening my eyeliner with a butterfly knife. You know. Typical weekday morning.
While running home from the bar in high heels I multi- tasked and sexted with Brent. Jesus.
I can feel my teeth in 4 dimensions. I shouldnt be this high at 8 in the morning.
He awkwardly handed me plan b on Pickens Street... it was like a sketchy drug deal.
Acid king. Jackson puked a lot. Promoter booth. Angry security. No acid. Probably a good thing.
It was a "have 911 on speed dial" kinda night
Why did u text me "I want to get drunk and go to pizza hut tomorrow. don't let me forget." at 3am??
That text was pretty fucking self-explanatory, man.
I just discovered that jello shots are the best hangover cure
You said that last night when you did jello shots at 4am
Randomize
