I missed Saved by the Bell this morning, but Ashley in a later episode of Fresh Prince is keeping the morning wood alive.
Important detail I forgot to tell you: leprechaun loves david bowie.
so we told my parents we were going trick or treating. got high as shit at some playground. and then bought our own candy so we looked legit when we got home.
legit been throwing up since 7am. told my parents the two bowls of puke in my dorm were soup
We shouldn"t be alone together
you didn"t say that yesterday
you weren't married yesterday
she won't be coming home tonight because she tried stealing a baby giraffe from the zoo
I did nothing besides stay sober all night, I walked home to find max naked knocking cups off the counter with his cock lol
The fact that I'm going to be living with you is starting to make me worry about my heatlh.
Ya that ship has sailed dude
I definitely pole-danced a parking meter outside a party last night. The cheering was appreciated.
I'm sure you can think of a way to make money.. God didn't give you boobs that awesome to waste them feeding your children..
Her ass is the reason I still believe in a higher power
all i've had to eat today is leftover bday cake and a shot of tequila.
welcome to college.
He does impressions. Handy knowing you can get fucked by one guy and pretend a group of celebrities is running a train on you.
So what's it like to be pregnant?
It feels like I'm hungover and when I was drunk I was kicked off a mechanical bull and then trampled.
She's celebrating a tinder-match-aversary and I'm not about that.
Randomize
