its barely noon and he already threw up and i have second degree burn
Just threw the poptarts. Sgits boutta go Down. 1 liter of wine
the laptop wouldn't balance on his lap. that's how well endowed he is.
You were with some girl. Your exs best friend. Your shirt was half undone and she was telling you to put your penis away. It wasn't out but you wanted to. Patron is your weaknes.
She looks like a junkie muppet...awful
Come over we're drinking with orange soda as a chaser to honor 90s nick kenan and kel.
She started howling at the moon. That was pretty much the deal breaker.
Is it cheating if its a threesome? This is more like a party game than infidelity.
Currently putting together my outfit for this weekend, AKA a poster board that says "I'll cook you breakfast and do all your laundry, take me home." On front and back
Do you think it would be a margarita if you just out tequila in a sonic slush?
I hope I don't have to wait for another triple crown winner to get laid again.
It's 7:30pm and we've already lost someone and had to run from the cops. What the fuck did you put in the punch?
3 cups of coffee and some molly. The "Tay's Day Off Diet"
MUFFINS DON'T MAKE YOU ORGASM MULTIPLE TIMES OR HAVE ROCK HARD MUSCLES.
If he isn’t into CosPlay he will be after tonight. That naughty nurse outfit heals broken hearts
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